On Top of the World

 

So here I sit, in my new studio, it seems like a bizarre dream. Things happened so fast, and yet it still felt like an eternity to get to this point. I can still remember clearly talking to Sara at a birthday party and she said “I’ve always wanted to open a studio downtown with another photographer.”  The sentence that would change the course of both our lives. Surely she didn’t think I wouldn’t take that seriously? Then we thought, “hey let’s throw in another person, a cosmetologist, cut down on rent and really offer people an experience when they get pictures. Hair, makeup, pictures and fun girls? What could be better than that?” (The answer is nothing, nothing is better than that, because we ARE fun girls).

Thus began the journey of finding “our spot” and facing disappointment after disappointment. Just when we were ready to throw in the towel and conclude that maybe a downtown studio wasn’t in our cards, we went back to one of the very first spaces we looked at it, and knew that was the one after all. That was 2 weeks ago, fast forward MANY long days and late nights, dust and nails and paint and wood………..and here we are; on the cusp of a new journey, a new adventure, a new dream, so excited (and tired, REALLY tired, it’s been a long 2weeks). We are so ready to take this place, The Studio El Dorado, and make it a amazing. A place that people will stop by and hang out for a bit, a place that makes people feel beautiful, a place that captures moments in time for families, a place that our children can come to and build childhood memories in. A place that is ours, where hopes and dreams are coming to fruition, all because 2 girls who barely knew each other talked at a birthday party.

As I sit here, in my studio (that makes me giggle every time I say it) I’m listening to the Imagine Dragons song “On Top of the World” and the lyrics couldn’t be more fitting for our situation. (They must be, they inspired me to blog for the first time since December!!!)

‘Cause I’m on top of the world, ‘ay
I’m on top of the world, ‘ay
Waiting on this for a while now
Paying my dues to the dirt
I’ve been waiting to smile, ‘ay
Been holding it in for a while, ‘ay
Take you with me if I can

And I am, on top of the world, and you better believe this smile couldn’t get any bigger!!

Total Random “I haven’t blogged in a month” Post.

I have seriously neglected this blog for a while. Not on purpose, I have so many things to write about, it’s just finding the time to sit down and get it all out.

We had a crazy busy holiday month with Harper’s 3rd birthday:

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Oh that smile, kills me.

Christmas celebrations at the Botanica Gardens light show:

 

 

 

Christmas Eve:

Poor girl was sick on Christmas Eve. Go figure.

 

 

 

Aaaaand, I have NOTHING from Christmas day. Yup, Mommy fail. I was too busy enjoying it and being with family. I DID manage to squeeze in a photo sesh with Miss Collins:

 

 

 

 

 

 

And now it’s January and with that brings a whole new set of “stuff”

*I put my 2 weeks in at the Y. Say wha-at!! I did. It wasn’t an easy decision. I have worked there since we moved here to El Dorado 4 years ago.  It’s been a great place to work and I have met SOOOO many people working there. Why did I decide to leave?

Well chill out and I will tell you!!

*I start school in 2 weeks- My online courses to finish my degree start on the 22nd. Super excited, but super scared to do online classes. I consider myself pretty computer smart; I designed my own website, I do all the stuff on this blog, I FACEBOOK!!  But seriously this online bizz has me thrown for a loop. I am blaming K-State’s website and student portal, I think IT is the one that is dumb, not me. I literally had to call up the financial aid office and ask them to walk me through what I was supposed to do, because their e-mail and website was gibberish to me. They were probably like “geez old lady, get with the program, it’s not THAT hard. Stupid non-traditional students.”

*I started watching an 8 week old baby- Landry is a doll and I have enjoyed having him so much. He is such a good baby, and I am able to get my baby fix and still sleep all night!! Pax woke up this morning (Saturday, mind you) at 7:30 and looked at me and said “we need to get up, Landry is coming.”  Ok Buddy, knock yourself out waiting for that to happen, I’m going to keep sleeping.

*I started my photography business- It’s getting really busy already. I am booked every weekend in January, newborn session scheduled for February, a WEDDING scheduled in May, and it just keeps growing. This is my true passion and I want to devote as much time and attention to this. Do I know what the future holds? Nope. Do I know if this will work out? Nope. Do I have plans to make it even bigger and better? Yup. I don’t want to divulge too much right now, as a lot of things are still getting ironed out, but there are big things… BIG THINGS in store with this photography thing and with some great people who I will potentially be working with.

I can’t even tell you how excited I am for all of this, I feel that I have found “my thing.” I was always jealous of Josh because our restaurant business was “his dream” and he loved doing it. I wondered if I would ever find anything like that for myself. Don’t get me wrong, I love being with my children, and I have loved being home with them most of the time while working at the Y. Now they are getting older and I am able to focus on me. I am not trying to be selfish and OBVIOUSLY my kids will always come first. I mean who else is going to feed, bathe, and teach them that “son of a bitch” is not a polite thing to say? Please, if you find someone, send them my way. MMMMKAY?

On that note, I leave you with this:  A comedic GENIUS that I just found today. I mean, this girl is HILAR! (That’s my shortened version of hilarious). I spent about 2 hours of my life today watching her channel on YouTube. Oh Grace, you got me girl, you got me goooood. Fist bump to you my friend.

 

You’re welcome.

No Words……

 

“Mom, why did that boy do that thing to all those kids?”

I pause, with my hand on his door, and turn to look at my innocent little 5  year old tucked safe in his bed.

I kneel by his bed, with tears in my eyes, and try to find the words to explain something that I don’t understand myself.

“I don’t know buddy.”

“Did it hurt?”

“No baby, God was with those kids that day and he put a giant blanket around them and they didn’t feel anything at all.”

He seems satisfied with that answer and rolls over, hugging his Curious George closer to him.

Why am I having to answer questions about this? Why am I living in a country where little kids now have to fear going to school? Why do I have to explain to MY 5 year old, that kids his own age were innocent victims in a horrendous crime? It makes my heart break in a million little pieces.

Pax said he overheard Josh and I talking about it, I thought I was doing a good job sheltering him from all of this. I guess not, and really, there is no easy way to discuss something like this with a small child. They don’t teach this in parenting classes.

“Ok class, so that’s how you change a diaper, next class we will discuss how to talk to your child after a mass shooting at an elementary school.”

I never thought I would have to have a conversation about this………with my 5 year old…….who is now a little less innocent since this happened.

I hope things change, something has to. Or else I fear the world my children will have to grow up in.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Dream Big………..

So this week I did something big….no HUGE. I have been pondering this for a while now, playing around with the idea, hearing my best friend tell me that it’s something I should do……. but I just kept hesitating. Dragging my feet, if you will. I made a website for it, about a month ago, and have been lingering with the mouse over that publish button for about a week. Each time I was about to click on it, I would chicken out and close the laptop and step away.

But I finally grew a pair, opened that website, purchased the domain name and went public with my photography business. (Insert panicked scream here)

I love photography, love love love it. I LOVE taking pictures. I LOVE editing and seeing something that was “eh” straight out of the camera turn into something pretty cool. I love capturing a moment in time and freezing it with a simple “click” of the camera and all of a sudden it becomes a memory for someone to treasure.

I don’t love the idea of putting myself out there for criticism because, let’s be honest, it’s going to happen. I don’t love the idea of potentially losing this passion for photography because, let’s be honest, it might happen. I don’t love the idea of putting one more thing on an already full plate because, let’s be honest, that’s already happening.

But maybe this just means I need to get a thicker skin, always try to remember why I started doing this in the first place (see paragraph 3), and maybe clear my plate a bit to make room for something that truly matters to me and is good for my soul.

You see, I can’t live thinking “what if?” It’s about taking a chance, it’s about trying to believe in myself since there are others who already do…….and I thank you (you know who you are). I can’t even tell you how much that means to me and how flattered I am for your confidence in me when I have a hard time being confident in myself. It’s about acknowledging your little shove in my back that urged me to take this giant leap and do something that I never would have had the nerve to do alone.

And to everyone who might not think I am the greatest at photography, I tell you this: I’m not trying to pretend to be. I am sure I have a lot of growing and learning to do, and I plan on doing it. But I am also taking a huge risk and following my dream……and really how can you hate on that?

(Editors note: I have not heard any negativity towards this decision, I am just being proactive and addressing it now because it’s bound to happen, as it does with all businesses.)

And to those who support me and have given me kind words? Thank you. Simply……...thank you. There are no other words that can truly convey the depth of gratitude I have for your encouragement and positive feedback.

So here I stand, at the beginning of who knows what, a little scared, a bit overwhelmed, and a lot excited about what could come of this………A life without risk really isn’t much of a life at all. So here I go………

http://www.amyhallphotographyks.net/

And no post would be complete without a couple photos of my favorite subjects!

 

And Then There Was One More…..

Just when I thought my family couldn’t get any better………we meet Miss Collins Cate and I realize……...it can.

I am so glad I was able to be there to watch my niece be born, ask anyone; I FREAKED out when I thought we weren’t getting to the hospital fast enough when Sarah got induced (someone had to look like a model before we could go to the hospital…..ahem, AMBER) and then I FREAKED out when we were out shopping in the mall (and letting Sarah rest), when her husband texted me to tell me she had went from a 2 to a 5 in a couple hours. I was yelling at Amber to drive faster back to the hospital, because I was just SURE Sarah would dilate from a 5 to a 10 in a half hour and we would miss the whole thing……..of course I was wrong…..but not by much!

We got back to the hospital and hung out for about an hour or so, the nurse came to check her again and said she was a 9 1/2!! See? Laugh it up family, laugh it up!! If we had kept shopping we MIGHT have missed it all. Ok totally being dramatic, but seriously? None of us expected it to go that fast.

(the nurse telling us she was dilated to a 9 1/2)

My little sister is a rockstar, she looked at childbirth and said:

“what up hooker? I am going to dominate you, and not even break a freaking sweat!”

So it looks like her plan to have a half dozen kids might actually come true…………..sorry Derek.

(Amber coming back into the room and finding out Sarah is almost fully dilated)

Sarah getting a little emotional when she realized how close she was to meeting her little girl…..

but then she was all smiles! I mean SERIOUSLY? Who looks this cute in active labor right before they push a baby out? I would hate her if I didn’t love her so much.

So we all hung out for a bit, the nurse told us it could be another hour or so before she started pushing…..15 minutes later her doctor (cutest thing in the world, by the way) came in and was all like: “let’s do this!”

And then it was a flurry of activity in the room as nurses came in, lights came on, mirrors came down from the ceiling (sounds like a kinky movie eh?…. Yeah I just went there).

I wish I could have caught Derek’s face on camera in that moment (I was just trying to stay out of the way) he looked so panicked and confused and he even said:

“wait, so is this happening?…..Like NOW?”

And it was. Happening. NOW.

And then, in true rockstar form, my sister pushed through about 5 contractions and then we met Collins Cate Lorson.

 

 

 

 

 

Favorite picture EVER! Look at that tear on her face as they place her baby on her chest. Heart.Stop.I.Melt.

Words cannot describe those moments. When my baby sister finally got her chance to be a Mommy. After years of practicing with our babies, and the struggle her and Derek went through to have their own, and then that moment it happened…..she was a Mom………and all was right in the world.

 

 

 

 

 

And she was perfect, and beautiful and everything we had imagined she would be. Just when you thought it wasn’t possible to feel any more love for the family you have, this happens, and you realize there is no limit to love. It just grows as your family grows.

 

 

 

 

I am so lucky to have such an awesome family. And not just my siblings (who are my best friends in the whole world!) but everyone else that makes our family complete. Significant others, in-laws, and now a new baby. Love doesn’t get divided, it just multiplies. And how blessed am I that my math equation of a family just got one more new addition?

 

 

 

Pretty damn lucky.

 

To view the entire slideshow I made from her birth, click on the link below, turn the music up and grab some tissues if you’re the emotional type.

http://www.kizoa.com/slideshow/d3595207kP160731622o2/collins-birth